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• By - Admin
• October 13, 2025

Why Most Marriages Struggle Today – An Astrological Perspective

1. The Modern Reality
Why are so many marriages breaking today?
If we look around, the reasons often sound very simple: “He never listens,”“She only wants her way,” “We just can’t adjust.”

But today’s crisis goes far deeper. The number of divorces has skyrocketed. Extra-marital affairs have become common headlines. Couples fight not just verbally but to the extent of violence — in extreme cases even ending in murder of the spouse.

This makes us pause and think: "After all, weren’t the same nine planets — Rahu, Ketu, Saturn, Mars — present earlier too? (Pehlay bhi toh wahi 9 graha the, kuch naye toh aaye nahi). So why does the same planetary alignment feel far more destructive in today’s marriages?"

Clearly, the problem is not only in the chart; the problem lies in how Desh (environment), Kaal (time), and Patra (individual capacity) have changed.

2. Visible Problems in Modern Marriage
Now, let us pause and observe the common problems we see in marriages today:

❖ Ego clashes- Both husband and wife often carry the attitude: “My way or the highway.” Neither wants to bend, and every discussion becomes a battle of egos.

❖ Upbringing- Children today are rarely told “No.” When they grow up, they simply don’t know how to handle rejection or compromise.

❖ Adaptability- Earlier, people were trained to adjust; today, they expect the world to adjust to them.

❖ Extra-marital affairs- These are no longer shocking exceptions; they have become disturbingly common in everyday conversations.

❖ Violence- Disagreements that once ended in silence or sulking now sometimes turn into threats, abuse, and even shocking cases of spousal murder.

Now pause for a moment and think: Do you really believe these problems are created by the planets alone?

Of course not. The planets only reveal tendencies. But whether those tendencies explode into destruction or are handled with maturity — that depends on Desh (the environment we live in), Kaal (the time and era), and Patra (the individual’s capacity).

3. The Root Cause: How Upbringing Creates Impossible Partners
Let us step back and ask: Why is adjustment so rare today?
A major reason lies in modern upbringing. From a very young age, children are repeatedly told:

   •“You deserve the best.”
   •“You must always be number one.”
   •“You can achieve anything.”

On the surface, there is nothing wrong with these ideas. They inspire confidence and ambition. And I am not against telling a child that they can achieve great things.
But the mistake happens when these messages are taught without balance.
Children must also hear lessons like:

   •“Sometimes you will fail, and that’s okay.”
   •“Patience is as important as ambition.”
   •“Not everything you want will come exactly when you want it.”

Without this balance, ambition grows, but humility dies. The child begins to think: “If I don’t succeed, the fault lies with the world, not with me.” They never learn to digest a “No.” They never learn to wait. And they never learn to bend.

🏫 Childhood Then vs Now
Think of earlier times. In school, if the teacher scolded or punished us, it was normal. Our ego did not shatter. Parents scolded or even slapped when needed — yet no depression, no rebellion. Only lessons learnt. One stern word from the father was enough to set us straight.

Every day, balloon-sellers, kulfi-walas, or toy vendors came to the colony. We children cried and demanded, but parents rarely gave in. Sometimes we were punished for being stubborn. Automatically, we learnt: “Not every wish is fulfilled.”

For bigger desires — like new clothes, a bicycle, or a toy — waiting was the rule. Nothing happened instantly. That waiting cultivated patience.

Now look at today’s children. They learn to swipe screens before they learn to write. One click, and the toy, the food, the dress — everything is delivered at the doorstep. Subconsciously, they learn: “Life is this easy. One click = desire fulfilled.”

So what happens when real life doesn’t give instant results? They feel broken. And when they enter marriage, they carry this same fragile mindset.

🎭 Over-Indulgence
Another modern pattern is over-indulgent parenting. A child goes to play school, and parents behave as if they are dropping them at an international airport. They over-analyze every small thing: “He must learn music, dance, sports, travel, or he will be behind.”

The child has no such need yet, but parents project their own anxieties. This over-pampering creates tantrums, a sense of entitlement, and the inability to face any “No.”

👉 And here’s the question: Can such a child, once grown, handle rejection in marriage? Can they compromise when their partner says something opposite? Most often, the answer is no.

🔮 Astrological Lens
Astrologically, this modern upbringing reflects clearly in the chart:

   •Rahu gives endless illusions and too many options.
   •Mars pushes aggression: “I must win, I cannot bend.”
   •Saturn’s pressure creates restlessness instead of patience.
   •Weak Venus makes them blind to small gestures of love.

This is why I often say: Modern upbringing has trained our children to become professionals, but not partners.

4. A Wisdom Sutra Beyond the 7th House
Astrologers often rush to the 7th house whenever marriage problems are discussed. And yes, it is the right house. But is it the whole story? Not anymore.

Normally, the 7th house, its lord, and malefic aspects upon it are studied. This is correct, because the 7th house is indeed the seat of marriage and partnership.
But here lies the deeper wisdom: in today’s time, 7th house affliction alone does not explain everything. Why? Because even in earlier times, the 7th house used to be afflicted. Rahu, Mars, Saturn — they were present then too. Marriages had issues, but they did not collapse as rapidly and dramatically as today.

So what is different now?
👉 Along with the 7th house, we must also examine other sensitive parameters that shape the mindset of the native:
• Moon – emotional maturity and stability.
• Mercury – thought process, communication, discrimination.
• 5th house – intelligence, creativity, and self expression.

When these are afflicted by Rahu, Mars, or other malefics, the situation worsens. Such natives become moody, stubborn, unwilling to listen, and addicted to their own viewpoint. They lose the ability to distinguish right from wrong.

🔍 A Case Example
I once studied a chart where, surprisingly, the 7th house looked quite normal. No heavy affliction, no dangerous combinations. On the surface, one would predict stability. Yet, in reality, the couple was on the edge of divorce.

On deeper analysis, I saw that the 7th lord was connected with the 11th lord. This combination creates endless expectations from the spouse. No matter how many qualities the partner has, the native always feels it is “not enough.”

Now, add to this an afflicted Moon and Mercury. The mind becomes restless, critical, and adamant. The spouse is constantly judged and found lacking — even when they are not at fault. Over time, suffocation builds, interest in the partner dies, and divorce starts looking like the only option.

Here we see: the root cause was not only the 7th house. It was inflated expectations (7th + 11th link) combined with weak emotional balance (Moon) and distorted intellect (Mercury).

🪔 The Sutra
Here lies the real sutra of our times:
👉 The 7th house shows the marriage, but Moon, Mercury, and the 5th house reveal the mindset. And mindset decides — will the marriage bend, or will it break?

And remember, these tendencies do not affect only marriage. A person with such imbalance struggles in every sphere where cooperation is required. In the workplace, they cannot be good team players. In friendships, they fail to sustain trust. Wherever relationships demand patience, they invite conflict.

This is why remedies too must go beyond the 7th house. Yes, we strengthen the 7th house through rituals. But in today’s context, we must also heal Moon and Mercury — through mantras, mindfulness, journaling, communication practices, or karma-alignment rituals. Only then can the person’s mindset truly shift.

5. Astrology Hasn’t Changed – But Times Have
The nine grahas are eternal. Saturn has always tested patience. Mars has always provoked aggression. Rahu has always created illusions.

Yet earlier, even with these same combinations, marriages somehow survived. Couples fought, yes — but they stayed together. Extra-marital affairs existed, but in very small numbers. Divorce was rare.

So what changed?
👉 The Kaal (the era we live in).

In the past, a person could feel Rahu’s illusion in their mind, but there was no vehicle to act on it. If a husband and wife were upset, they simply stayed silent in the same house. Running to a stranger was not so easy.

Today, Rahu doesn’t just create the illusion — it instantly gives you the medium to act:
• Mobile phones 📱 – a private world in your pocket.
• Social media 🌐 – constant comparison, constant temptation.
• Dating apps 💔 – illusion available at a swipe.

The result? What once remained only in imagination, today becomes action within seconds.

So let us be clear: the grahas have not become stronger. It is the times that have made their expression faster, sharper, and far more visible.
(🌿 Graha wahi hain, par ab unki acting ka stage badal gaya hai.)

6. The Teacher’s Lens: Desh, Kaal, Patra
In astrology, no chart can be read in isolation. The planets speak, yes — but their voice is always filtered through three lenses: Desh, Kaal, and Patra.

• Desh (environment). In joint families, society itself acted as a control system. Before breaking a marriage, people thought a hundred times: “Log kya kahenge?” Today, in nuclear families and cities, anonymity gives freedom to hide, to lie, and to act without fear.

• Kaal (era). Earlier, patience and adjustment were survival skills. People waited months for crops to grow, or days for a letter to arrive. Today, everything is instant — instant coffee, instant noodles, and sadly, even instant breakups.

• Patra (individual capacity). Modern upbringing often creates fragile personalities. A child who never hears “No” in childhood collapses when life says “No” in adulthood. Small stress feels unbearable because mental stamina was never built.

👉 This is why the same Mars that once created only arguments now leads directly to divorce — earlier, environment and upbringing absorbed its fire, but today nothing cushions the blow.

🌿 The Sutra: If a child cannot hear “No” in childhood, they will not know how to bend in marriage.

7. Astrological Indicators of Struggle
Now, let us come to the chart itself. The 7th house represents marriage. Its condition, its lord, and the planets influencing it show how marriage will feel.

•When Mars dominates, aggression, fights, and arguments increase.
•When Venus is weak, the sweetness and romance vanish.
•When Saturn dominates, patience is tested and marriage feels heavy.
•When Rahu dominates, illusions rise — and today, they become instant reality through modern mediums.
•When Ketu dominates, detachment comes in — partners may live together physically but feel emotionally absent.
•When Sun dominates, ego battles surface — one partner always wants to shine more, leading to power struggles.
•When Moon is afflicted, emotional instability creates mood swings and insecurity, disturbing harmony.
•When Mercury is weak, communication fails — words are misunderstood, and small issues turn into big fights.
•When Jupiter is afflicted, wisdom and values weaken — instead of guidance and dharma, arrogance or false morality takes over.

✨ “These planetary influences may sound abstract, but in real life they take very tangible forms. Let us look at a few case examples where each graha clearly left its mark on a marriage.”

🌿 Case Example 1: Aggression That Burns Harmony
A young professional once came to me saying:
“Guruji, every discussion with my wife ends in a fight. We both want to prove we are right.”

His chart showed Mars strongly aspecting the 7th house. His wife’s chart also had a Mars influence. Both carried the same “I am always right” energy. This created constant competition inside the marriage.

Mars brings passion and energy, but when uncontrolled, it turns into impulsiveness, anger, and constant fights. Couples under strong Mars influence often react first and think later — every small disagreement becomes a battlefield. Over time, this aggression burns the sweetness needed to sustain harmony.

🌿 The same fire that gives warmth can also burn the house down.

👉 The remedy was to strengthen Venus — through rituals, but also through practical habits like using softer words and doing seva together. Slowly, respect and listening grew.

“Here I didn’t suggest a Mars remedy alone, because when fire is too strong, sometimes the real healing comes from invoking water — Venus qualities like sweetness and harmony.”

✨ Teaching Insight
Many people think the only way to solve a planetary problem is to pacify that exact planet. But astrology is not always about “pressing down” a force — sometimes it is about balancing it.

🌿 “When fire is too strong, sometimes the healing comes not from more fire rituals, but by invoking the water of love.”

🌿 Case Example 2: Missing Sweetness
Another case involved a woman who said:
“My husband provides everything, but I don’t feel loved.”

Her chart revealed a weak Venus. There was no sweetness left in her marriage. It was not about money or security — it was about emotional connection. Once she started Venus-strengthening practices (art, music, simple expressions of love), she felt revived, and her marriage began to heal.

✨ Insight Line
“When Venus is weak, material comforts may remain, but the rasa — the flavor of love — quietly disappears.”

🌿 Case Example 3: Rahu Illusion
A man once confessed:
“I don’t know why I keep chatting with strangers online. I love my wife, but I can’t stop.”

Here, Rahu was heavily aspecting his 7th house. In earlier times, this illusion might have remained only a fantasy. But today, Rahu gave him the medium — the phone in his hand. Once he realized this was not about desire but about karmic illusion, he began practicing discipline, and the grip started loosening.

✨ Teacher Insight
🌿“Rahu never satisfies; it only multiplies desires. The remedy is not indulgence but awareness.”

🌿 Case Example 4: Saturn’s Coldness
In one marriage, the wife complained:
“He never talks. He never expresses. It feels like I am living with a wall.”

The husband’s chart revealed Saturn dominating the 7th house. His sense of responsibility was high, but his ability to express emotions was blocked. Over time, silence turned into suffocation. Once guided towards Saturn’s higher lessons — discipline in showing care, structured communication, seva together — the marriage slowly warmed up.

✨ Sutra
“Saturn does not deny love — it only delays its expression.”

🌿 Case Example 5: Ketu’s Detachment
A woman once said:
“My husband is present at home, but it feels like he lives in another world.”

Ketu was influencing his 7th house. He was detached not out of anger, but out of karmic withdrawal. Unless Ketu energy is balanced with Venus, the partner feels invisible. Through spiritual practices and shared rituals, he began grounding his energy — bringing presence back into the relationship.

✨ Reflective Line
🌿“Ketu teaches that presence is the real gift. Without it, even physical nearness feels like distance.”

8. Lessons & Teacher’s Guidance
So what do we learn from all this?
👉 First, astrology is not about declaring “your marriage will fail.”
Instead, it tells you: “This is where your soul must learn cooperation, patience, and humility.”
👉 Second, marriage is not competition. It is a partnership.

Every planet is like a teacher, guiding us with a lesson:
• 🌞 Sun – Balance Ego & Respect
Shine without burning your partner. True radiance is when both shine together.

• 🌙 Moon – Balance Emotions
A calm mind strengthens bonds; a restless mind weakens them.

• 🌟 Mercury – Communicate with Care
Right words at the right time can prevent a lifetime of hurt.

• 🔥 Mars – Channel Aggression
Use passion to protect, not to fight.

• 💖 Venus – Keep Love Alive
Sweetness must be nurtured daily through small gestures.

• ⏳ Saturn – Learn Patience
Strong bonds are built slowly, brick by brick.

• 🌌 Rahu – Stay Grounded
Illusions grow when inner contentment is weak.

• 🪷 Ketu – Value Presence
What you ignore today, you may crave tomorrow.

• 📿 Jupiter – Follow Wisdom & Values
A gentle truth heals faster than a harsh fact.

✨ I often tell my students: See your chart not as a jail, but as a classroom.
A jail locks you. A classroom guides you.

🌸 “For me, astrology is not about predicting divorce or labeling charts as doomed. It is about showing the path — how a person can understand their own nature, align with the right partner, and create harmony even when planets show challenges.”

— Amit Shrivastava (Astro Amit)

9. 🌟 Practical Tips for Couples – 9 Planetary Lessons
In Vedic astrology, every graha is not just a planet, but a teacher. Each one enters your life to give a very specific lesson. If we are willing to learn, these lessons can transform even a struggling marriage into a journey of growth. Think of this as your personal “marriage classroom” where nine teachers are guiding you every day.

Here is a wisdom box you can come back to again and again:

📦 Wisdom Box: 9 Planetary Lessons for Marriage Harmony

🌟 Saturn – Respect Time
Marriage grows slowly but surely. Patience is Saturn’s biggest gift.
✨ “Strong bonds are built brick by brick.”

🌟 Venus – Nurture Love
Show affection in small daily gestures. Love fades without care.
✨ “Love is not proven once, it is nourished every day.”

🌟 Mars – Channel Energy
Let your passion protect the relationship, not destroy it.
✨ “The same flame can cook food or burn the house.”

🌟 Rahu – Avoid Illusions
Don’t get trapped in comparisons and endless desires. Stay grounded.
✨ “Illusion outside grows when contentment inside is weak.”

🌟 Ketu – Accept Detachment
Learn to value what you have before it slips away.
✨ “What you ignore today, you may crave tomorrow.”

🌟 Jupiter – Hold Wisdom
Choose gentle truth over harsh facts. Wisdom builds trust.
✨ “A gentle truth heals faster than a harsh fact.”

🌟 Moon – Balance Emotions
A calm mind becomes the anchor of a marriage.
✨ “Peace in mind brings peace in marriage.”

🌟 Sun – Balance Individuality
Shine with your partner, not at their cost.
✨ “True radiance is when both can shine together.”

🌟 Mercury – Improve Communication
Right words at the right time can save years of conflict.
✨ “Good communication is half the remedy.”

✨ 10. Closing Sutra
So, why do marriages struggle more today? Not because the planets have changed, but because the times and our inner capacity have changed.

Astrology does not predict your doom. It reveals your lessons.
Marriage is not about two perfect halves becoming whole. It is about two whole souls learning to bend, to listen, and to walk together.

Before we close, pause and reflect: 
👉 When you look at your own chart, don’t ask “Will my marriage succeed or fail?” Instead ask, “Which planet is calling me to grow? Where do I need to bend, to listen, to sweeten, or to trust?”

If you see your chart as a classroom, marriage will no longer feel like a battlefield. It will become what it was always meant to be — a sacred journey of two souls walking side by side.
And astrology is the mirror that shows where the bending must begin.

🌸 Signature Closing Line 🌸

"For me, astrology is not about fear or fixed fate. It is about direction — a mirror that shows where harmony begins when we learn to bend."
— Amit Shrivastava (Astro Amit)